marching along

How do I begin describing my love hate relationship with perfumes? I hate it when there is this one person whose cologne or perfume is too strong for my liking and the smell dries up my nostrils which will give me a bad headache and will develop into a migraine. Yup, true story bro. I can get migraine from people's perfume.

So when I find a perfume that I like (and that is quite rare) and does not give me any aura of potential migraine inducing smell (an absolute plus point), I feel like I've got lucky. Naturally, I like my perfume to be very light and refreshing which is what Lanvin's Eclat d’Arpège is and when I want my scent to be much sweeter, Tresor Mdinight Rose by Lancome is perfect for it. Signature smell? I think I found it.

There is a need to keep my eye area moisturised even though I have oily skin so I spent quite a bomb on this thing. Personally, I don't use it under my daily make up so I included an extra step in my night skin care routine and the next morning I wake up with errrr still puffy eyes but they are more moisturised. Which is still good and it's something I want because the next products I'm going to show will crease on me in an instant if I forgo this step.

My Bobbi Brown Correcter in Deep Bisque and Creamy Concealer in Honey. I still cannot figure out how does a correcter work because at a glance, Deep Bisque is definitely not a peach looking base for correcting dark circles. My under eye dark circles are terrible but the correcter works perfectly fine. After that, all I need to do is to dab a little of the concealer and I'll look less haggard. These two were my first purchases from Bobbi Brown and I'm already a huge fan.

Major love. Absolutely love this. Not a mascara girl because I honestly own one and will use it till it dries out. I've been using Maybelline's Falsies since for.e.vah. but I didn't like it and I didn't really hate it. My lashes are naturally long but it doesn't curl up. People have been telling me to get an eyelash curler but the idea of curling my eyelashes before and after I apply my mascara sounds like a hassle to me. Until I came across this bad boy and decided to give it a try, let me tell ya gurl, I'm never turning back. This holds my eyelashes up and makes it so thick and it lengthens and it does all sort of magical things with my eyelashes without it being clumpy. Holy graaaaaail indeed.

Not a beauty related thing but dang, these bad boys are expensive as hale. I miss taking pictures and I haven't been doing it properly for 2012. This babies came in just in time for my end of month BKK trip. I'm planning to go light this time round and I'm hoping to bring only my Natura Classica. It gives me a thrill to load an analogue camera with film. I miss doing this.

I manage to watch a few movies though. My favourite has to be The Silver Linings Playbook just two mad people falling in love with each other. My kind of favourite story you know? I watched 2009 Time Traveller's Wife a few nights ago, went to bed crying and woke up with swollen eyes. Italian movie The First Beautiful Thing had me sniffling too because I am sure at some point in life we think our mothers are embarrassing but they are still so wonderful in every single thing they do whether we understand their intentions or not.

So this is a long entry aye? I'll probably be back with more pictures hopefully. It seems like working and handling life in general is making me feel like I have no more time to do anything else. See you all soon muacks!

how i try to stay oil free and acne free

Yoohoooo! This is going to be the first time ever I am going to post something that is beauty related. Disclaimers before I proceed, I am definitely not an expert and I am not a beauty guru or an enthusiast. I'm here just to share what works for me and my search for the perfect skincare products is never ending.

Some brief description of my face: I am a VERY oily person. I know of people who tend to get oily on certain parts of their face like their T-zone or cheeks. For me it's a very frustrating thing having to handle oily skin because I am very oily on my forehead, cheeks and chin.

Other than being oily, I used to have acne for 3 years and those years were definitely the worst. I've had family members being overly concerned about my skin condition and to make everyone and myself happy, I went to the dermatologist and was put on a course of oral antibiotics and topical cream for a period of 6 months. Once completed, my skin would remain clear for another 4 months or so and then the acne came back again.

I went through another 3 courses of antibiotics and I decided I do not want to depend on oral medications any more.  I tried out skin care products that claimed will combat acne. I went through products from high end brands to the ones we can get in our drug stores but nothing works. I switch products immediately if my skin breaks out or if it is too drying for my face.

Finally and after so long, a colleague at my work place recommended me to try out a pharmacy only skin care brand that will help for acne AND oily skin. I've been using these products for almost a year now and I use other skin care products additionally just for further control of oil.

My day moisturizer I've been using for almost 8 months now. The best thing about this is that it is oil free and it's consistency is super light. It doesn't feel heavy on my face and when I put this on sometimes I tend to forget if I've moisturized for the day or not. I use the whole range of products in this line, including the AHA facial wash which I love very much and also its toner. I don't see this being sold in drug stores but it's not a problem for me since my work place has it.

Favourite, favourite, favourite moisturizer ever. Oil control, matte and it has SPF in it. What does that mean? Shine free face the whole day! I very well know it's a day moisturizer but I use it in the night time instead. I put this on and then slap on my Naruko Night Gelly mask. When I wake up the next day, I feel my face completely matte and my night mask is being completely absorbed into my skin. Major love except the only thing I cannot stand is probably the smell when I first took a whiff ugh. I wish it was nicer smelling but for what it does to my face, I can't really complain.

I think people everywhere might have heard of Naruko products. There's a hype about it in Taiwan but the only product I used and repurchased so far is the Oil Out Tea Tree Night Gelly. It is a leave on mask so there is not a need to rinse it off after application. I love the smell of it actually and how soothing and cooling it is when I apply it to my face before I go to sleep. It helps to correct the water-oil balance in the face and that it helps to absorb the oil and leave moisture in the face. 

I don't know what will I do without these products because I feel that the combination of these above products for now is sufficient for my acne prone and oily skin. I feel that I've come a long way struggling with acne and oily skin and it makes me very happy when people say that my skin has gotten so much better.

Thank you for reading this post. I am slowly trying to get into cosmetics (le gasp) and that  my friend, is going to be another journey that will be documented much later hehe.

2013

Hello. Guess I am a little late to wish all of you a happy new year but better late than never! Happy new year to all. I hope 2012 was awesome for you and if not, I hope 2013 will be so much better. In case you guys are not aware, I've changed my url from elevendecember to xisthisinsane.

As an individual, I went through phases in my life when I felt New Year is just the same old thing over and over again. People are going to say what for wait for the year to be over and then have resolutions to strive on for the new year. Besides nobody ever complete their resolutions right?

For me, resolutions or in my case, change is hard. I don't handle change very well actually. I've always been a very pessimistic person and I consider myself as an introvert no matter how many times people tell me that I'm the complete opposite. I'm not going to lie about the fact that I set boundaries with so many people.

2012 was a horrible year for me. I find the need to be alone most of the time last year. I went through months not looking forward to anything at all. I rather be alone than being surrounded by people. I wake up and immediately thinking of sleep so I spent most of my time sleeping because I do not want to do anything. I do not want to think of anything.

I honestly pray for a better me in 2013. It takes time. I am not asking permission from anyone at all to try to understand what I've been through or what I will be going through. There's a never ending struggle inside me. I have always refused to let anyone know about my sadness because ultimately telling other people about what you feel will be just making you feel a tiny bit better yet the problem is still there. People are going to say I am selfish. But it is time I am selfish for my own self.

I found a statement by a psychotherapist, Frtiz Perals, online and his words will most probably push me to achieve self happiness and self fulfilment. When I read it the first time, I felt that he was talking to me and I am sharing it with you:

I do my thing and you do your thing
I am not in this world to live up to your expectations,
And you are not in this world to live up to mine.
You are you, and I am I,
and if by any chance we find each other, it's beautiful.
If not, it can't be helped.

Insya Allah, to a better person for my own self this year. And for that, I will be actively documenting things here because it's a space that I want it to witness of my own growth and changes. Is this still a photography blog? Yes, it is. With just a little bit of change along the way.